Panic!

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

im sleepy.. im tired... everyday im freaking tired... today is worst... worst than any other stupid day before... today... i feel like fainting... i feel like falling on my bed... not doing any other stupid thing... im tired... no... im shacked... yea... i dunno why... physically, i feel ok... i cld probably run the 2.4 again... but mentally... im mentally drained... mentally shacked... im tired of absorbing information repeatedly... i mean... i got so many subjects, how does the sch expect me to absorb info of every subject and not forget a single damn thing?? its mentally draining... sigh... i need rest... my holiday... now, i rather go for the OBS than be stuck for another week in sch... i dunno... OBS is tough... but its physically tough... this is mentally draining... so screw it...

i woke up tired... my arms were weak... i cldnt use them properly... really... i had a crap day in sch the day b4... did at least 60 - 70 pumping... in a row... yea... to those ncc, it aint tat tough... but hey... my arms may be strong, but it has to support a weight... umm... yea... u get the pic... so i need to LOSE WEIGHT... tats besides the point... cus of PE, we were playing volleyball... and the teacher tol us if we wanted to pass the ball to the other team to let them serve, dun throw over the net, roll under the net... if throw over, pump... so this smart alec whole day forget... keep on throwing over the net again and again... no matter how many million times we remind him... and there was even one time he kicked the ball over the net... huh?!?!?! oi.. can listen to instructions or not??? is he spastic?? damn... so we got freaking lot of pumps, plus the balls we needed to hit with out hands... so mua hands hurt like hell now...

i jus realised how screwed up i am... i dunno how to answer a single chem question on orbitals... really... i had a worksheet given by my teach... so i tried it out.... and, i could only do a few... damn it... why like that??? im gonna flunk... i got 1 more week to study... argh!!! pray tat i'll pass... more mugging.. sigh...

i finally understand coordinate geometry... i was doing today and suddenly: "orh... so its liddat 1 arh... i understand"... wah... i finally understand... jus need a little more practice and i shld be ok... remember the formulas, and i shld be ready for the test...

now wat i hate is the tons of work piled up on my ass... i haf to pass up a history essay on monday, and history assignment doesnt jus come in worksheets telling u wat to do for the essay... it comes with one HUGE stack of readings that u hafta go thru b4 doing the essay... its a lot... and i got another essay due on next next week, on my test date... wtf... i haf a test to study for, i got mugging to do... and i still need to go through ubber thick stacks of notes and do 2 essays... i mean, i already need to go thru 3 stacks of notes for my test... plus 2 more?!?!?! u trying to kill me??? damn!!!

good thing my other teachers (those whose test are ova) are kind and understanding... give close to negligible amt of hw, giving up lessons to teachers whose tests are up soon... yea... tats one gd thing abt sch... understanding teachers... take for example my eng teacher... gave up her lessons on monday and tuesday to my chem teacher to drill us abt more on orbitals (tat i dun understand obviously... okok... i understand, but dunno how to do the questions)... haha... more history lessons are needed though.. i really dun wanna fail my hist again... so, more mugging...

i haf a lit test tomorrow... so far i feel lit is ok... partially cus the teacher is lenient in marking... haha... but also cus i understand the text... sigh... i really feel that im taking up too many subjects... i haf 9 subjects... or issit 10?? i dunno... but its alot... and i really cant balance all of them... i dunno... anyways... im shacked already.... need sleep but still hafta study... so bye then... sigh...

{7:00 PM}