Panic!

Saturday, October 07, 2006

ok. i decided to make 1 last post before the exams go on and on and make me freaking crazy again. perhaps tomoro i will post? i don't think so.

its crazy really. all the mugging. and biology isn't exactly an easy subject. ok, so maybe some things are easy to remember and stuff like that. but hell. its a lot of stuff man. so i wonder whether i will make it past this time. the whole thing. or will i crack under the immense pressure? i'm hoping not

but hell. its really crazy. more than half of the battle has been fought. but the whole thing is wearing me out. really. and this year is just one of the many battles i will have to experience. i know that next year will be worse. no doubt. but yet this is my life. i have to live it. even if sometimes its hard 'cause it kinda makes me go crazy. take it from me. studying in my school. its crazy. yes. people hear that i'm from this school and they all go "wow!" or they tell my parents "your son so clever!". but hell. you see all the stress? some people can see. some people that i have talked to know that i'm on the verge of collasping.

you say exams can't make one collaspe. please. i beg to differ. let's see. i take triple science, triple humanities, and every damn subject that my school has to offer. exams are consecutive. every day brings one new exam. and this weekend is the only time i have for rest. so wait. think again......

will i go mad?

hell. i'm hanging on to the fact that i'm probably going to get A1 again and make myself happy. but wait. i ask myself.....

am i happy?

all the various things that i'm doing now in life. studying, mugging.....

does it make me happy?

hell no. who gets happy mugging? its crazy. try it. huh... try to be in my shoes for 1 week. just 1 week of school. no exams. just 1 week of school... i guess you will say it's a miracle that i even can make time to blog. then since normal school days are crazy, now try 1 week of exams.

think about the number of subjects i have to mug for. sometimes i even have to mug for 2 exams the next day. 2 exams in one day. woah. crazy...

but wait. i guess i'm doing fine. i'm alive. i'm still sane. yeah. i'm still sane. but for how long?

yes. i know. exams are going to be over soon. then we're all going to be happy. but i said before, there's still next year. then if i get into JC. wouldn't it be worse? promos, prelims, A levels. endless. army. University. do you live to study or study to live?

personally, i don't want any. i said before, Bill Gates didn't study. he's a freaking billionaire for goodness sake! but its all part of the Singaporean Plan.

you study, you get a certificate. you get rich (cash), you can get a credit card, buy a condo, a car. so its all about money isn't it? huh? we're studying for our future. a future that is so uncertain. who knows whether we will even get a job in the future. now so many people have a Uni cert. SUPPLY OUTSTRIPS DEMAND. so if everyone's going to be an entrepeneur, isn't that more competition?

yes, yes. i'm delving too deep into everything. whatever.

i'm just saying.... i'm stressed. i'm tired. i'm shagged.

so says the Smallville theme song

somebody save me....

{9:54 PM}

HASTEN yourself

Welcome to my world of panic.
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PANICKY man

name:BryanOng
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MSN: bryanong_91@hotmail.com

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